All Posts Tagged ‘millennial

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Silicosis

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My last grandparent is on his deathbed.
His wife died on my birthday in April.
I keep thinking about beginnings and endings.
Inhalations and exhales
If my lungs had to be scarred from an occupational hazard what would I choose?
Silica?
Asbestos?
Dust mites from the carpet in my cubicle lit by fluorescents?
Or hairspray from matinee and evenings spent backstage?
Instead I wake up with my lungs scarred from fear.
I’m unable to speak my truth never mind live it.
I’m a fraud.
I’m the best actress that ever was.

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It’s been roughly 6 months and 20 days since my last post and I can say a lot has changed in that time.

I moved from Boston to China to New York City.

I turned 22.

I started a 2 year sabbatical from men.

More updates to come.

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To Do List

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1. Scan job postings

2. Consider a crappy position that will hopefully lead to a dream job

3. Apply to said position even though it’s in Los Angeles

4. Get writer’s block while crafting the cover letter

5. Pray…to G-d, Allah, Yahweh (cover your bases)

6. Type a crappy cover letter and send it off anyway (recruiters barely read them)

7. Exercise/relieve stress

8. Eat

9. Drink

10. Sleep

11. Wake up and do it all over again…until you get the call for an interview

12. Ace the Skype interview

13. Get the job

14. Worry about moving to the other side of the country

15. Try finding affordable and safe housing – fail

16. Try buying a car – somewhat successful

17. Pray

18. Graduate

19. Move back home (not in Los Angeles)

20. Make it work